You want to start a regular contemplative practice.
There is almost nothing more simple than meditation and contemplative prayer. All you do is sit there in the silence.
Easy, right?
But don’t mistake the simplicity of meditation with meditation being easy. It’s not easy, which is why I wrote up these 5 simple tips for those trying to get a regular (shoot for daily!) practice off the ground.
Tip 1: Meditate right away in the morning
For myself and the many meditators I know, mornings work best. Before you open your email and your to dos rise in your mind, start your day off right. Be intentional with the first hour of morning and meditate right away.
My daily morning routine looks like waking, making coffee, reading, writing, and meditating. I find that if I don’t get my twenty minute sit in within the first hour of my day, it’s very unlikely I’ll be able to make time for it later.
Tip 2: Pick (and stick) with a time
This means, pick a certain amount of time to meditate and stick with it, for at least a week. This means DO NOT do 5 minutes today, and 10 minutes tomorrow, simply because you “feel like meditating a little more today”.
Part of meditation is about the letting go of how much we identify with our “feelings.” So it’s my suggestion that you pick a specific number of minutes, something that will stretch you but not break you, and commit to that number for a week. Once the week is over, consider increasing the amount of time.
This also means you don’t stand up in the middle of your sit saying, “This isn’t working!” or “I’m wasting my time,” or “I can’t turn off my mind.”
Reality check: no one is good at meditating! The times when our mind is the busiest are the days when you are working your mental muscles most. Stick to the time you committed to, even when it’s hard!
Tip 3: Close your eyes, the whole time!
I understand some people genuinely aren’t comfortable with closing their eyes, and for them, there are helpful ways to keep them open. But if you are new to contemplative practice and are just getting used to closing your eyes without falling asleep, make sure you bring some integrity into your practice by keeping your eyes closed the whole time.
Part of what we are doing in contemplation and meditation is temporarily disengaging from the external world. There’s no reason to open your eyes when you’re distracted. There’s no reason to look at the clock or your cell phone to “see how much time is left,” or look around the room because you “don’t think this is working.” These curiosites are just thoughts in your head, simply let them go. (By the way, knowing “how much time is left” does not change how much time is left!)
Tip 4: Look for the benefits of meditation outside of the practice
The idea that meditation is supposed to “make me feel good” is a serious misconception. This is approaching meditation like we approach medication: looking for instant relief.
But meditation doesn’t quite work this way. Buddhists rightly call our busy minds the “monkey mind” because we don’t know how the mind will react during our contemplative practice. For this reason, you shouldn’t bring any expectation into the practice, including the expectation that it will make you “feel good.”
Instead of approaching meditation like a good to be consumed, look at meditation as a process, like going to the gym: every day you sit in meditation for twenty minutes is twenty minutes you spend with your mind at the gym. Every thought you let go of, every time you return focus to your breath or attention to your sacred word you are doing a mental curl. This mental curl is one of release, surrender, and openness. Returning to your breath or sacred word is what gives you interior peace, not necessarily in the moment, but later in the day.
This approach means you’ll be letting go of the need to control your experience. Does your meditation help you let go of the need to be perfect or successful? Does it make you less reactionary when that person that gets under your skin almost sets you off? Does your meditation help you step back from overreacting at your partner? Does it make you a more gentle, accepting, and loving person?
Those are the real benefits of meditation, not a quick fix to a bad case of anxiety.
Tip 5: Download an App
At the weekly meditation group I run, over half of the participants use Insight Timer to provide a basic timer with free bells to begin and end each meditation sit.
It is also chock-full of guided meditations of all kinds.
There is everything from guided visualizations to basic anapana mindfulness. There are meditations rooted in all the great spiritual traditions like Buddhism, contemplative Christianity, Islam and more.
All completely free.
Go ahead, Take a Seat.
You’ve got 5 tips to get you started. If you’re looking for more help, go ahead and download my free guide on Establishing a Meditation Practice. Whether coming to meditation through mindfulness or contemplative prayer, it’s all about cultivating the roots of your inner life.
So go ahead, take a seat.
If you’re looking for some quick tips on getting regular with a contemplative prayer or meditation practice, download the meditation starter kit with 5 Tips on Establishing a Meditation Practice.
At 84, I am hardly conscious first thing in the morning. I have my sit after breakast.
I understand that, Maria! That’s one reason why I love coffee- haha. This blog is just meant to give some general suggestions and guidelines for practice. Everyone will need to adjust things so it works for their specific needs. Glad you’re finding time for your sit!
Thank you for practical and very helpful tips. A few sips of coffee before I begin
Thanks, Keith. I appreciate your insights on now to begin and enrich my CP practice.
Susan
Thanks for sharing this. I am guilty of checking the clock from time-to-time. I am just amazed at how much the “monkey mind” just keeps going and going. I think sometimes I spend more time engaged with thoughts during the 20-minute sit than actually remembering the sacred word. But, I just keep on sittin’.
I practice simran since a few years ( Mantra-Meditation) which works best for me. Its like the Bible tells us. Iam protected by the Name of God. Sometimes my Mantra comes Automatic already and if not i use it if i need it. Frees my mind from all negative thoughts in all negative Circumstances or Situations. Its almost magic how iam and my mind has changed. Again like Bible says it, Iam your God and fight for you and you be still/silent/silent mind. BUT most of all – Thank you for your service to us. Namaste and God bless 🙂